A Little Extra Time

I'm currently immersed in a social experiment, it is called how much can I take. My week Monday - Friday is wall to wall school and clinical. And when I'm at clinical, it is often late. Tonight I have a therapy group to co-facilitate for parents of seriously ill kids and I won't be home until 8:30. That is, if nobody needs a little extra time. I just tried to make an appointment for a haircut in October and failed.  The only times open on the weekend would have gobbled up my exercise time on Saturday -- and sorry, that is sacred. So is this really so bad - come on, right, I'm a full time student, not working? Well, a couple things are killing me, the first is that I have to drive all over for clinicals. And Austin traffic is terrible. I have to drive up to Dell Children's Hospital tonight, for just a one hour meeting. The second thing is my professor (for 3 of my 5 classes) is pathologically disorganized. She has many other good qualities -- she's smart and experienced, and not a hard-ass, but I'm so tired of things not being posted for class until a couple hours before, and things forgotten, and .... if I was not the opposite kind of person (you know, the one always early to the meeting), it would be easier. I hope that when I graduate my family doesn't have to visit me in jail. Because I so want to strangle her with my bare hands (please....just a little strangle....I'll stop....I promise). So since Mon - Fri is taken that means my weekends are all study, all the time. Ken and I make it point to go to Vino Vino (best wine bar ever) one night, but that's all the fun I get, folks.

Clinical is fantastic. It's humbling to be allowed into such personal interactions, where people reveal their innermost fears and tribulations. I'm at a private therapy office, I'm the only NP, everyone else is a social worker. But that's good -- they offer a different perspective, and frankly I have so much to learn. The range of issues is huge. From serious abuse and addiction to just learning better relationship skills. I can't wait to see patients on my own. That may not happen this semester, but I'm gratified that I want to get there. Soon. My other clinical site is the Austin State Hospital Child and Adolescent Unit. It's dramatically different, but the two psychiatrists I'm paired with have been very generous with me, treating me as a junior colleague. I'll have some stories for my next post, but they will be heavily disguised. I will make absolutely sure that no personal data gets transmitted. I guess the biggest surprises I've felt so far are these: it's amazing how hard parents have to work to cope with a mentally-ill child. Just the school accommodations require a great deal of discussion and involvement. These parents are incredible; and the other thing (in the therapy office) is that boy, we sure don't have perspective on ourselves. I've heard jaw-dropping things where I struggled to hide my reaction that the patient minimized (oh, I smoke pot every day, but I'm not an addict because everyone does that), and OTOH I've learned to discount it when a patient says "this session will really be a big deal." (the ex wants to reconcile, sorry....well within the realm of normal.)

Dani is busy making a list of famous people she sees in NYC. Here's it so far: Edward Norton, Carla Gugino, Alec Baldwin, Coconut Records guy, Louis CK, Pineapple Express actor, a Sprouse twin. Some of those mean nothing to me, but I'm not 18. Ha. Every interaction we have, it's "I'm so stressed because you mean parents have me on a budget." Yes, Dani, this is a task that most of us in life have to learn. Get cracking. She figured out, though, that she can go try on Herve Leger dresses for fun in SoHo. It was a revelation - hey mom! I don't have to buy them! I told her I'd buy her one if she gets straight A's. (Well, it would work for me. You should see those dresses.)

Grumble

I don't have time for this (blogging) but I'm going to do it anyway. Grumble. I seem to be doing a lot of that lately -- I think it's how I express my worries that I've bitten off more than I can chew. I'm taking 5 classes this semester, specifically because there's an instructor I really like who's only teaching (get the name of this course) "Nursing Phenomena of Concern" in the Fall. I want to take it from her. And I want to have a better attitude, but I have 240 clinical hours to complete by the first week of December, I'm supposed to start next week and I don't even know where I'll be for prescribing hours. ARRRGGG. For a planner, it's a disaster. I had my interview Wednesday for my therapy hour placement, it was at the private practice office that's close to home. Looks good, I'm waiting to hear back from them. (Yes, it's Friday and I need to start Monday and I've checked my email 50 times this morning!!!) I will be learning how to do individual, group and family therapy with them if I get the nod. The two directors interviewed me over their lunch hour, it was fine but they were obviously rushed. Nobody screamed and they only laughed when I expected, so I hope that means I passed. Some interesting little extras this semester: I will be observing family court, going to NAMI meetings, and going to Al-Anon meetings.

We got Dani ensconced in New York. She gets along with her roommate and seems to be OK. We went to the Cloisters while there, which was really quite nice. It's a building way up in North Manhattan where the Met houses their medieval European collection. It's an incredible scope of art, including the architecture. Beautiful. http://www.metmuseum.org/visit/visit-the-cloisters Two pictures below are from there. We stayed at Times Square, mostly because I wanted to get two queen beds in one room and choices were few, and here's a piece of advice: don't ever stay there. Any other part of Manhattan has to be better than that. It's like the dirtiest, nastiest Mardi Gras parade you've ever been to, but 24 hours a day.

I've done a little volunteering at AIDS Services, doing their TB tests and even some foodbank days. We ask clients to bring in reusable grocery bags and the guy next to me opened up someone's bags and roaches scurried out. Really. Oh well, that's the only time that's ever happened. I love doing that work, but I'm pretty sure it's going to take a backseat for the next three months. Nile and I are still taking care of kitties over at Austin Animal Center, and I think we'll be able to keep doing that, mostly because we can do it on Sunday evening.

I read a good essay in Newsweek by Ira Glass - isn't he great? And his show on NPR, This American Life, it's great too. His piece is about love and the way life sometimes presents it to you. Be open to it in all its forms, I think is the message. He hooked me from the first two lines: "I’ve definitely had a f--ked up life in a lot of ways, but not because of big turning points where I made the wrong choice. It’s more like character flaws that played out slowly over time."
http://www.thedailybeast.com/newsweek/2012/08/26/ira-glass-on-rescuing-a-pit-bull-dog-with-a-ridiculous-diet.html